The Overnight Guest
Tuesday, June 22, 2010 at 7:00AM MAD21 By Michelle (Graceful, Faith in the Everyday)
Recently my friend Sarah’s daughter stayed with us for two days. And I’m going to state this honestly, without fear of offending Sarah, because good friend that she is, she knows me oh-so-well: I did not look forward to the experience. Not because I don’t love Laini – I do – or because Laini’s not a great kid – she is – but because the visit interfered with my finely orchestrated life. It was different; it strayed from the routine. Laini’s visit required that I step out of the box, shake up the system a bit.
I said yes because I genuinely wanted to help my friend Sarah, who had to travel out of town for a conference. I said yes because I love Sarah and her daughter. I said yes because I knew Sarah would do the same for me, without a moment’s hesitation. I said yes out of love, sure, but also out of a sense of duty and responsibility.
What’s funny is that in saying an obligatory yes, I was the beneficiary in so many unexpected ways.
For starters, Laini was a model houseguest. Polite, gracious, mellow – she listened well, seemed to have fun and even inspired better behavior in my own raucous offspring.
Second, it was eye-opening to witness how much the boys flourished in the experience. I eavesdropped on Noah and Laini as they whispered and giggled before bed. I glimpsed the three kids swing on the hammock, feet brushing grass, popsicles in hand. I heard uproarious laughter at the dinner table.
It was obvious my kids enjoyed stepping out of the routine. It was obvious they need to step out more often.
And it was good for me, too. I let go, changed it up a bit, went with the flow. And you know what? I survived. I managed the extra logistics just fine. It was so much less of a big burden than I anticipated.
It was a good lesson – one I learn and relearn in baby steps. And it gave me the incentive and confidence to host a play date with two of Noah’s friends the following week.
How did it go, you might wonder? Not so well. At one point Noah’s friend asked, within earshot of me, “Is your mom always this crabby?”
Ah yes, two steps forward, one step back. Two steps forward again. Baby steps.
Michelle is a Christian wife and mother of two originally from Massachusetts now living in Nebraska. She is a part-time writer, editor and fundraiser for Nebraska PBS/NPR. Michelle loves to write about how her family illuminates God's presence in her everyday life, and on finding (and keeping) faith in the everyday. Michelle enjoys reading, running and writing. Be sure to go visit her blog, Graceful, Faith in the Everyday.
Family Life, Kids, Parenting in Family Life
Reader Comments (10)
Yes, baby steps. All of us moms take them...
I know this feeling. We have a babysitter come twice a week now; my daughter loves the change in her routine. And we are starting to get out more as a family on weekends. It is a good thing.
Laura -- The steps backward are a bummer...but they usually lead to another few steps forward. I am a work in progress!
Kelly -- A babysitter is an excellent idea. I did that a few summers ago -- the kids loved the attention she relished on them (a nice alternative to my often-distracted attention!)
these are the gifts worth savoring and learning from, those we are hesitant to accept initially. marvelous!
You are right, Ed -- I need to open myself to new experiences more often! I am pretty set in my ways!
Great post! I am a big Graceful fan and glad I found Make a Difference to One!
How often I remain a slave to my day planner, my checklists, and my spreadsheets! Yes, I prize being organized--to the point that I all too often make it my idol. Thanks for this reminder that letting go of our idols frees us to be a blessing to others.
Thanks, Susan -- there' s good stuff to find here every day at Make A Difference to One!
And Nancy -- idol is not too strong a word to use in my situation -- I really am a slave to my routine. Having kids forces me to step out of the box from time to time...and I have to say, I'm rarely disappointed and almost always blessed by the new experience I find.
Ahhh.....
How cool is this!?! Michelle and Make a Diff all in one place. Grace and peace to you both..... And Michelle? I can relate. I'm a schedule girl -- gotta have it all lined out, formulated, on the calendar. This is a challenge for me, too.
Jennifer @ Getting Down With Jesus
I too like my routine, and cringe a little when I need to change it up. I find though that when adventure comes my way... I always think gee that was a lot of fun, and am happy I changed up the routine. My claim to fame was my visit with my mother-in-law. We spent a week together, and I can't count how often we laughed and the memories we created. It was a weak worth spending and a life time of memories I'm certain.